Working Hard or Hardly Working? Demystifying Erectile Dysfunction

A pair of jeans with a banana emerging from the zipper sits in front of an abstract red background. Hearts are doodled around the image.

As a community sexual health resource, one of the most common concerns brought to us by our customers is difficulty getting or maintaining erections. This topic can be challenging to discuss, and often contains within it a large spectrum of both physical and mental concerns. It is important to note that we here at As You Like It are not medical professionals, but we do have a plethora of educational information, product knowledge, and resources to share when it comes to penile function.

Especially with all of the over-the-counter supplements promising quick fixes, or books promising a cure-all, it can be hard to know where to begin with tackling erectile functionality. Luckily, we are here to demystify erectile dysfunction, including these often confusing and misleading products, and to discuss what other, more realistic options are out there. Because everyone deserves to experience pleasure, and there are many wonderful ways to do so that are safe for you and your body!

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Sex for Survivors

An illustration of two hands reaching toward each other. A heart grows from between their hands, and around them is hearts, flowers, smiley faces, and decorative spirals.

For those who don’t know, April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month. And the unfortunate reality is that while this may be a challenging and even painful topic to discuss, far too many people are navigating sex and relationships in this world as sexual assault survivors.

A 2018 study conducted in the wake of the #MeToo movement found that more than 1 in 4 women and 1 in 14 men are survivors of sexual assault, while 81% of women and 43% of men reported experiencing some form of sexual harassment in their lifetime. What this means is that it’s surprisingly likely that even if you personally never experience assault or harassment, there will be someone that you want to date or sleep with over the course of your lifetime who has. Understandably, survivors don’t always tell every person they go on a date with about their past trauma. So if you’re courting someone, dating someone, or sleeping with someone, it’s important to understand that whether you know it or not, you may be engaging in a relationship with a survivor.

So how can we support survivors in all of our romantic and sexual relationships, no matter how casual or committed they might be?

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Expanding Your Sexual Imagination

A person with light skin, dark blue geometric floral tattoos over their shoulder, and a shaved head, looks up ward. Their head is split in a squiggled line between the eyes, and dark blue flowers spill out of the space between. The background is blue and gold paint.

Have you ever looked at a toy in our store or on our social media and found yourself asking “what does that thing even do?” You’re not alone! This is actually one of the most common questions we hear from our customers!

The confusion is totally understandable, of course. The wonderful world of sex toys has become much wider in recent years. Where there used to be a few pretty reliable shapes you could find toys in — wand, bullet, rabbit, plug — these days, there are toys of all kinds of unique shapes and functions, some of which you may never have seen anything like before, even if you’re a relative toy aficionado!

The key is learning to look at all toys with both curiosity and creativity. Although it can definitely be helpful to learn the intended use behind the design of a specific toy, the best way to get the most out of toys is to experiment! Perhaps something that was designed for the clitoris also feels heavenly on your nipples, or maybe a vibe that was created with the prostate in mind just so happens to hit your g-spot at just the right angle. Toys offer nearly limitless avenues to all kinds of unique and unexpected pleasures. But if you never try, you’ll never know — so we recommend you get exploring as soon as possible!

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Redefining Romance

A white drawing of a griffin with outstretched wings in front of red flowers growing up a black brick wall.

Well, here we are. It’s February, the month of Love & Romance! And soaring in the skies above us, ready to swoop down like a fabulous, white-feathered winged griffin to bestow blessings and celebrations of holy eros and requited romantic love upon us is: Valentine’s Day!

But if we see romantic love as standing atop the pillar above the clouds, worthy of sundering us from all else, we tend to see other relationships as coming secondarily to the romantic duo. In fact, we are often told that nourishing other relationships comes at the expense of our romantic relationship. And we are certainly told that romance has no place other than within our romantic dyad.

And thus the potential woe of February 14th. If our celebration of love only exalts the holy romantic duo, what happens to those not in romantic relationship? What happens to those who intentionally choose a single or solo life? Or those with more than one romantic relationship in their lives? What happens to those in couple-hood who don’t feel the magic of the union? What about those in the romantic union who mourn and miss their lost ties of connection with friends and community?

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The P-Spot: Combining Health and Pleasure

The Health Benefits of Prostate Play

Short for Prostate, the P-spot is a small gland in the bodies of most penis-owners. For those that are interested in exploring, it can be found about two inches inside the rectum on the forward wall of the body.

Many have discovered in that when stimulated correctly, the prostate can also be a source of serious pleasure. Some have even achieved the elusive prostate orgasm! Because of the incredible potential of the p-spot, we carry lots of amazing toys designed specifically to stimulate the prostate, and it’s one of the most popular sections of our online store. So it’s safe to say that there are plenty of people out there discovering the pleasure of the p-spot.

And there’s even more good news for all the p-spot players out there! It turns out that there can be a lot of health benefits of prostate play as well!

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No Tricks, Just Treats

Purple vegan leather cuffs, a purple fluffy flogger, and purple jute rope sit atop a purple and black swirled background with gold stars adorning the image.

The weather is cooling down, the leaves are beginning to change color, and fall has arrived at last. And since it’s the season of shadow and spookiness, what better time to delve into one of the most misunderstood aspects of sexuality, the wonderful world of kink?

For those who don’t know, kink is defined as an intimate experience involving a consensual exchange of power or mutual exploration. A kink experience can be physical, sensual, sexual, psychological, spiritual, or any combination thereof! Kink is a broadly understood term that can refer to a wide range of activities, fantasies, and communities. You may have heard the term kink used alongside words like fetish, or used interchangeably with the acronym BDSM.

Thanks in part to the popularity of the Fifty Shades series, there are many widespread myths surrounding the world of kink. We’re here to pull back the curtain and demystify kink (as best we can in a single blog post) from the tyranny of misinformation.

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Talking Out Loud About Sexual Health

A black person stands with large green leaves covering their chest and pubic area. Behind them, more green leaves grow. The background is beige and white colors with green and brown leaf shaped illustrations around the edges.

September is Sexual Health Awareness Month — and unsurprisingly, it’s one of our favorite months to celebrate! At As You Like It, we believe that sexual health is just as important as any other aspect of our health. And yet, sexual health is discussed surprisingly infrequently.

Although exceptions absolutely exist, the reality of sex education seems to be woefully limited. It’s not difficult to see how the lack of inclusive and accessible sex education for youth can lead to a generation adults with a lot of questions regarding their sexual health. Worst of all, because of the lack of open conversation, many of these adults may be unsure of where to turn for answers.

That’s where we come in. In honor of Sexual Health Awareness Month, we at As You Like It want to give all the adults with lingering questions a do-over at their sex education. What would it look like if our sexual health education was inclusive, accurate, shame-free, and deeply invested in giving everyone access to the information and resources they need to make safer choices?

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Re-Thinking The Couples Toy

One person holds the Manta by Fun Factory out to a second person, who extends a finger to touch the tips. Behind their hands is a rainbow background and the image is accented by rainboe hearts and stars.

Customers frequently come to us looking for the elusive, perfect “couples’ toy.” The intriguing thing about this request is that the definition of couple, the bodies involved, and the desired feelings and sensations vary greatly from person to person, and even more greatly from relationship to relationship. All individuals and couples have entirely unique bodies and desires. Therefore, the category of the couple’s toy remains wide and vague.

The mainstream conceptions of what constitutes sex are still relatively narrow. But we want to remind you that sex is defined only by the people having it, and that sensations like penetration are not mandatory. Many people in relationships have anatomy that does not allow them to experience penis-in-vagina sex with their partner/s, whereas others may have physical restrictions that prevent it. Still, more people may simply not want to participate in penetration for their own personal reasons.

We are all unique people with unique bodies, desires, and relationships. Sex can be anything that you and your partner/s want it to be. And shopping for a toy together can be a great way to expand your idea of what sex can look like for you and your partner/s.

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Getting Hot or Cooling Down?

Several toys highlighted throughout this blog sit in a pattern atop a gold glittery background.

It’s getting hot out there! Like really, really hot. And as vaccination rates continue to creep up in our state as well as nationally, we know that many of you are eager for a hot, sexy summer.

And the weather seems to agree. This summer has already set records here in the Pacific Northwest for extreme heat, and the temperature shows no signs of dropping. With forecasts sticking in the 80s or above for the foreseeable future, this warm weather is something we will all have to learn to work with for the time being.

The good news is that there are plenty of ways to play with temperature, and bring both sizzling, scorching heat AND icy, tingling cold into your summer play. You can use these tips from our expert staff on how to toy with temperature any time of the year, but especially as the outside temperature continues to fluctuate.

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Sexual Health & Erotic Intelligence

Male Peacock

June is International Men’s Health Month, a month for bringing awareness and education about issues that affect men’s overall health. Our culture often keeps our eroticism and sexuality compartmentalized in small categories, disconnected from other parts of our physical, emotional, mental, and reproductive health. We are usually able to talk about the prostate and the importance of having it checked by a physician. We are often less skilled in talking about the importance of erotic pleasure in a healthy life.

I want to invite that level of awareness and attention to men’s erotic health or erotic intelligence, to bring understanding that our sexual lives are interwoven with our whole lives, and that our erotic health is part of our general health. For men, this often means having permission to access the full range of erotic possibilities available to them.

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