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Review of Curvy Girl Sex: 101 Body-Positive Positions to Empower Your Sex Life by Elle Chase
I want to start by saying, I was prepared to be disappointed by this book. I loathe most sex position books. Most of them are abelist, sexist, heterocentric, and wildly inaccessible for the majority of people. If you randomly open a position book, odds are you’ll land on a page featuring a sex position that makes you go, “Haha, NOPE.” These books often make me think of the Moses Hadas quote, “This book fills a much-needed gap.”
I was wrong about this book. I love this book. It’s the friendliest, easiest to read, most inclusive, most workable position book I’ve ever seen. It’s my new favorite sex position book, period.
Elle Chase writes in a direct and friendly way. She is a knowledgeable sexual health educator, but the book doesn’t contain any indecipherable jargon and is very readable. The illustrations in the book are of explicit sexual acts and still manage to be totally adorable. The language of the book is explicitly geared towards women (trans and queer inclusive); however I think even cisgender gay men would find nearly everything works for them as well.
The first part of the book has no sex positions. You could call it a guide to getting into the positions mentally and emotionally. She directly addresses societies messages towards fat women, and about finding your truth and power outside those harmful messages. Then she gives the sex education lessons we should have gotten in school and didn’t. These empowerment guides and helpful tidbits are sprinkled liberally throughout the rest of the book.
The positions include pictures of lots of different types of bodies and couplings. The sections include solo play, penetrative sex, and best positions for oral intercourse. Every section has tips for modifying and making things work for you. I appreciate the frank discussion about the practicalities of moving tummies, butts, boobs, and thighs around.
The position changes are often subtle. Saying there are 101 completely different sex positions in this book is a bit of a stretch, particularly at the end when we have repeat sex positions (but now in a car or the shower.) However, that minor criticism aside, I am giving this book 5 out of 5 stars. It’s not just for curvy girls, but for any woman or couple who wants solid positions and a body-positive message.
How can we heal from trauma? How can we support the survivors in our lives? How can we build relationships in an ethical way? This book may not offer all the answers, but it opens up discussions and offers a good place to start.
Learning Good Consent is a collection of multiple works by multiple authors on the topic of support for survivors of trauma, collected and edited by Cindy Crabb.
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