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Violating consent isn’t limited to sexual relationships, and our discussions around consent shouldn’t be, either.
To resist rape culture, we need a consent culture—and one that is more than just reactionary. Left confined to intimate spaces, consent will atrophy as theory that is never put into practice. The multi-layered power disparities of today’s world require a response sensitive to a wide range of lived experiences.
In Ask, Kitty Stryker assembles a retinue of writers, journalists, and activists to examine how a cultural politic centered on consent can empower us outside the bedroom, whether it’s at the doctor’s office, interacting with law enforcement, or calling out financial abuse within radical communities.
More than a collection of essays, Ask is a testimony and guide on the role that negated consent plays in our lives, examining how we can take those first steps to reclaim it from institutionalized power.
Kitty Stryker is a writer, activist, and authority on developing a consent culture in alternative communities. She is the founder of www.ConsentCulture.com. This domain is a hub for LGBT, kinky, and polyamorous folks looking for a sexcritical approach to relationships. Kitty also cofounded the artsy sexy party Kinky Salon London, as well as creating the award-winning Ladies High Tea & Pornography Society. She also created the San Francisco–based kink party Whippersnappers, and acted as head of cosplay for queer gaming convention GaymerX. Kitty tours internationally, speaking at universities and conferences about feminism, sex work, body positivity, queer politics, and more. She lives in Oakland, California, with her wife, boyfriend, and two cats, Foucault and Nietzsche.
Campus Sex, Campus Security is Jennifer Doyle’s clear-eyed critique of collegiate jurisprudence, in the era of campus corporatization, “less-lethal” weaponry, ubiquitous rape discourse, and litigious anxiety.
Today’s university administrator rides a wave of institutional insecurity, as the process of administering student protests and sexual-assault complaints rolls along a Möbius strip of shifting legality. One thing (a crime) flips into another (a violation) and back again.
On campus, the criminal and civil converge, usually in the form of a hearing that mimics the rituals of a military court, with its secret committees and secret reports, and its sanctions and appeals.
What is the university campus in this world? Who is it for? What sort of psychic space does it simultaneously produce and police? What is it that we want, really, when we call campus security?
An anthology exploring the act of passing-as the “right” gender, race, class, sexuality, age, ability, body type, ethnicity, and beyond.
Nobody Passes is a collection of essays that confronts and challenges the very notion of belonging. By examining the perilous intersections of identity, categorization, and community, contributors challenge societal mores and countercultural norms. Nobody Passes explores and critiques the various systems of power seen (or not seen) in the act of “passing.”
In a pass/fail situation, standards for acceptance may vary, but somebody always gets trampled on. This anthology seeks to eliminate the pressure to pass and thereby unearth the delicious and devastating opportunities for transformation that might create.
Others have turned to Janet W. Hardy’s ‘The Ethical Slut’, ‘The New Topping Book’ and ‘The New Bottoming Book’ – for advice on the most challenging questions of sex, polyamory, kink, and self-identity.
But Janet had to make it up as she went. How did she do it? Well, as you might expect from the co-author of ‘Sex Disasters… and How to Survive Them’, it hasn’t all been roses (or thorns for that matter).
Here, in Impervious, Janet takes you through the five twisty stages of her own kinky life – mirroring those of any good scene – negotiation, warmup, engagement, climax, and aftercare.
Delicious (and surprising) details await you inside. Bon Appétit!
How can we heal from trauma? How can we support the survivors in our lives? How can we build relationships in an ethical way? This book may not offer all the answers, but it opens up discussions and offers a good place to start.
Learning Good Consent is a collection of multiple works by multiple authors on the topic of support for survivors of trauma, collected and edited by Cindy Crabb.
Shawna Potter, lead singer of War On Women, has been a musician for over twenty years—and has been sexually harassed, discriminated against, or made to feel unsafe for just as long. Recently, she’s been training venues of all kinds to be safer spaces for people who experience harassment.
This pamphlet is her DIY guide for any music, art, or community space looking to make the world a better place. It’s a detailed and radical call for our communities (not just the survivors) to take power back from harassers and abusers without involving police or other authorities.
In this modern fairy tale, a noble prince and a brave knight come together to defeat a terrible monster and in the process find true love in a most unexpected place.
The digital illustrations are rich in color and depth. This is an illuminating fairy tale for young readers to be able to see that not every prince would like to marry a princess.
How can you build unshakable confidence and resilience in a world still filled with ignorance, inequality, and discrimination? The Queer and Transgender Resilience Workbook will teach you how to challenge internalized negative messages, handle stress, build a community of support, and embrace your true self.
In this important workbook, you’ll discover how to cultivate the key components of resilience: holding a positive view of yourself and your abilities; knowing your worth and cultivating a strong sense of self-esteem; effectively utilizing resources; being assertive and creating a support community; fostering hope and growth within yourself, and finding the strength to help others.
Once you know how to tap into your personal resilience, you’ll have an unlimited well you can draw from to navigate everyday challenges.
Dedicated to trans women everywhere, this inspirational collection of letters written by successful trans women shares the lessons they learnt on their journeys to womanhood, celebrating their achievements and empowering the next generation to become who they truly are.
Written by politicians, scientists, models, athletes, authors, actors, and activists from around the world, these letters capture the diversity of the trans experience and offer advice from make-up and dating through to fighting dysphoria and transphobia.
By turns honest and heartfelt, funny and furious or beautiful and brave, these letters send a clear message of hope to their sisters: each of these women have gone through the struggles of transition and emerged the other side as accomplished, confident women; and if we made it sister, so can you!
The Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability is the first complete sex guide for people who live with disabilities, pain, illness, or chronic conditions.
Useful for absolutely everyone, regardless of age, gender, or sexual orientation, the book addresses a wide range of disabilities — from chronic fatigue, back pain, and asthma to spinal cord injury, hearing and visual impairment, multiple sclerosis, and more. Expertly written by a medical doctor, a sex educator, and a disability activist, The Ultimate Guide provides readers with encouragement, support, and all the information they need to create a sex life that works for them.
The authors cover all aspects of sex and disability, including building a positive sexual self-image; positions to minimize stress and maximize pleasure; dealing with fatigue or pain during sex; finding partners and talking with partners about sex and disability; adapting sex toys; and more.
Although this workbook was originally the companion to UnF*ck Your Intimacy, the tools in this workbook can also stand alone to help you gain deeper understanding of your intimacy needs with yourself or others.
Full of questionaires, self-reflection prompts, and exercises, this insightful, helpful workbook is sure to help you UnF*ck Your Intimacy. By Faith G. Harper, Ph.D.
Stories From People with LGBTQ+ Parents
In recent years, the world has been saturated by endless blogs, articles, and books devoted to the subject of LGBTQ+ parenting. On the flip side, finding stories written by the children of LGBTQ+ parents is akin to searching for a needle in a haystack.
Now that the world is more accepting than ever of non-traditional families, it’s time to create a literary space for this not-so-unique, shared, but completely individual experience.
In Raised by Unicorns: Stories from People with LGBTQ+ Parents, Frank Lowe has carefully edited an anthology that reflects on the upbringing of children in many different forms of LGBTQ+ families. From Baby Boomers to Generation Z, it features diverse stories that express the distinctiveness of this shared journey and of each particular family. It’s visceral, raw, and not always pretty, but love is always the common thread.