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We were not prepared for #metoo when it blew up Twitter in October 2017. In many ways, we still aren’t. What do we do when we learn a friend has been harmed? And what does it mean to be a good friend when someone we love caused the harm?
We live in a society that confines survivors to silence. Our only avenues to address harm do little to prevent its recurrence. Trapped within a binary of silence or punishment, it’s no wonder so many of us remain paralyzed even as the disclosures continue. Punishment requires both certainty and authority, which most bystanders lack. But once the silence has been broken, we can’t return to it. Few of us are strangers to the nagging feeling that arises within that paralysis. We intuit—correctly—that we have some kind of responsibility when harm happens in our communities, but what is it? And if we have responsibility, do we have rights?
Combining behavioral neuroscience and insights from those on the frontlines of harm intervention, Disrupting the Bystander helps us break out of paralysis so that we can best support those we love—whether they were hurt or hurt someone else.
Paperback. 225 Pages.
“An essential handbook for supporting those who have been harmed, while also caring for yourself. If you’ve ever felt helpless in the face of someone else’s discomfort or pain, this book will teach you how to show up and stand up.” —Laszlo Bock, CEO of Humu and author of Work Rules! Insights from Inside Google to Transform How You Live and Lead
“A must-read for anyone interested in repairing harm in their communities. Using a combination of personal narrative and research, A.V. Flox provides a map for helping others to heal while continuing to hold abusive individuals accountable. We all know people who people who have been harmed and people who have harmed. This is why everyone should read this book.” —Kelly Sundberg, author of Goodbye, Sweet Girl: A Story of Domestic Violence and Survival
“I’m both thrilled and relieved that A.V. Flox’s important work is now unleashed upon the world. Our communities need better guidelines for reducing harm, ones that are informed by neuroscience and the mechanics of trauma, and I can’t think of a more meticulous and conscientious author to handle the task.” —Arden Leigh, creator of The Re-Patterning Project and frontwoman of Arden and the Wolves
A.V. Flox is a journalist who has written for the LA Times, Village Voice, LA Weekly, VICE, and Gizmodo.
How do we make social justice the most pleasurable human experience? How can we awaken within ourselves desires that make it impossible to settle for anything less than a fulfilling life?
Author and editor adrienne maree brown finds the answer in something she calls “pleasure activism,” a politics of healing and happiness that explodes the dour myth that changing the world is just another form of work.
Drawing on the black feminist tradition, she challenges us to rethink the ground rules of activism. Her mindset-altering essays are interwoven with conversations and insights from other feminist thinkers, including Audre Lorde, Joan Morgan, Cara Page, Sonya Renee Taylor, and Alexis Pauline Gumbs.
Together they cover a wide array of subjects—from sex work to climate change, from race and gender to sex and drugs—building new narratives about how politics can feel good and how what feels good always has a complex politics of its own.
A dynamic celebration of trans male culture, this essential collection makes visible a decade of FTM and transmasculine experiences.
Independently published from 2009 to 2019, Original Plumbing grew from a Bay Area zine to a nationally acclaimed print quarterly dedicated to trans men. For nearly ten years, the magazine was the premier resource focused on their experiences, celebrations, and imaginations, featuring writing on both playful and political topics like selfies, bathrooms, and safer sex; interviews with queer icons such as Janet Mock, Silas Howard, and Ian Harvie; and visual art, photography, and short fiction.
In celebration of the magazine’s ten-year run, this essential collection compiles the best of all twenty issues. Selections are reprinted in full color, with an introduction by activist Tiq Milan and a new preface by the founding editors.
You may be getting older but love and sex are still a vital part of your life. Here is the book that speaks to your concerns about sex beyond the middle years.
Two leading experts have completely updated and revised the classic guide on the subject to address the needs of our changing world in the new millennium. Because a vibrant and satisfying sex life has no age ceiling!
The Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability is the first complete sex guide for people who live with disabilities, pain, illness, or chronic conditions.
Useful for absolutely everyone, regardless of age, gender, or sexual orientation, the book addresses a wide range of disabilities — from chronic fatigue, back pain, and asthma to spinal cord injury, hearing and visual impairment, multiple sclerosis, and more. Expertly written by a medical doctor, a sex educator, and a disability activist, The Ultimate Guide provides readers with encouragement, support, and all the information they need to create a sex life that works for them.
The authors cover all aspects of sex and disability, including building a positive sexual self-image; positions to minimize stress and maximize pleasure; dealing with fatigue or pain during sex; finding partners and talking with partners about sex and disability; adapting sex toys; and more.
Others have turned to Janet W. Hardy’s ‘The Ethical Slut’, ‘The New Topping Book’ and ‘The New Bottoming Book’ – for advice on the most challenging questions of sex, polyamory, kink, and self-identity.
But Janet had to make it up as she went. How did she do it? Well, as you might expect from the co-author of ‘Sex Disasters… and How to Survive Them’, it hasn’t all been roses (or thorns for that matter).
Here, in Impervious, Janet takes you through the five twisty stages of her own kinky life – mirroring those of any good scene – negotiation, warmup, engagement, climax, and aftercare.
Delicious (and surprising) details await you inside. Bon Appétit!
How can we heal from trauma? How can we support the survivors in our lives? How can we build relationships in an ethical way? This book may not offer all the answers, but it opens up discussions and offers a good place to start.
Learning Good Consent is a collection of multiple works by multiple authors on the topic of support for survivors of trauma, collected and edited by Cindy Crabb.
A powerful study of the women’s liberation movement in the U.S., from abolitionist days to the present, that demonstrates how it has always been hampered by the racist and classist biases of its leaders. From the widely revered and legendary political activist and scholar Angela Davis.
Longtime activist, author and political figure Angela Davis brings us this expose of the women’s movement in the context of the fight for civil rights and working class issues. She uncovers a side of the fight for suffrage many of us have not heard: the intimate tie between the anti-slavery campaign and the struggle for women’s suffrage. She shows how the racist and classist bias of some in the women’s movement have divided its own membership.
Davis’ message is clear: If we ever want equality, we’re gonna have to fight for it together.
Shawna Potter, lead singer of War On Women, has been a musician for over twenty years—and has been sexually harassed, discriminated against, or made to feel unsafe for just as long. Recently, she’s been training venues of all kinds to be safer spaces for people who experience harassment.
This pamphlet is her DIY guide for any music, art, or community space looking to make the world a better place. It’s a detailed and radical call for our communities (not just the survivors) to take power back from harassers and abusers without involving police or other authorities.
How much of your sex life is informed by gender norms that you may not even be conscious of? Eli Sachse’s zine is all about learning to explore your sexuality in a healthier way, with great boundaries and consent. These concepts apply whether by yourself, with strangers, or with trusted others. This zine is a […]
The Remedy invites writers and readers to imagine what we need to create healthy, resilient, and thriving LGBTQ communities.
This anthology is a diverse collection of real-life stories from queer and trans people on their own health-care experiences and challenges, from gay men living with HIV who remember the systemic resistance to their health-care needs, to a lesbian couple dealing with the experience of cancer, to young trans people who struggle to find health-care providers who treat them with dignity and respect.
The book also includes essays by health-care providers, activists and leaders with something to say about the challenges, politics, and opportunities surrounding LGBTQ health issues.
Both exceptionally moving and an incendiary call-to-arms, The Remedy is a must-read for anyone—gay, straight, trans, and otherwise—passionately concerned about the right to proper health care for all.
Dating used to be a thing that most people did for a while. Now it’s faded to take up a cramped and awkward space in between hooking up and instantly moving into together. If you woke up all alarmed and find yourself wanting all that old shit, letters and sodas, read this zine and get […]
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